Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
false alarm, still single
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
