what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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