Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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