Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
