windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
