I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
high people should be assigned attendants
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
