hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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