This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
After tacos, we're chasing women.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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