so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
