I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
