wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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