oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
