I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
