wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
