Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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