is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Randomize
