I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize