never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
