Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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