loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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