is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
