remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
