the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
