How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
