Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
