question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
