This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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