I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
The adults are the big ones right?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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