I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
