Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Drunk walkin through police station. America
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
