you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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