Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
