would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
