You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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