I will die if light touches me.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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