u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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