There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize