This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
