he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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