Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
