I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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