"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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