Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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