I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
True strength comes from lack of pants
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
