So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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