The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
