So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
