I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
How naked do you want me to be?
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