Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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