Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
