He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
